Every Marriage Is Not Meant to Last, and That’s Okay

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Paul Seabrook here from Seabrook Law, and I’m here to talk to you guys again about the doctrine of the Hollywood marriage, okay?

We’re told—all of us get messages from the time we’re very young, that we’re supposed to fall in love, get married and live happily ever after. And, you know, when you, when you think about all the movies and all the content that gets put in front of our face, you know, putting this message out there, it’s no wonder that a lot of us fall into this trap, where what’s going to happen is: you’re looking for marriage, you’re looking to build a family, you’re looking to live the American dream, and boom, you fall in love; you propose; next thing, you know, you’re married, and you’re supposed to live happily ever after. Now, that happily ever after, you know, for a lot of people, you know, they’re able to stay together and, and, and together and make it through. A lot of people have hard times, and a lot of people are going to suffer through some times that make it impossible to stay married, okay? And that is because this happily ever after thing can be really hard, you know. When you start talking about communication, and then you’re going to have kids and kids are going to have appointments, and they’re going to get sick, and it’s gonna be school, and there’s going to be homework, and there’s going to be doctor’s visits, and there’s going to be activities, and there’s going to be this, that and the other, and then there’s jobs, and then they’re saving for the future. And then there’s buying a home and saving for retirement and—and all these things get into a relationship and it can be really very difficult. And when you come to terms with the fact that you don’t want to be in this relationship anymore, one of the things you need to understand is that perhaps we didn’t think about this relationship enough in the beginning. And, you know, you don’t get any kind of advanced training on what marriage is going to look like and how it’s going to be and, and how you really have to work together and be on the same page, if it’s going to work long term.

So, you know, one of the things I want to make sure that I get out there in the world, is a message of forgiveness. Because, we get into these relationships, we’re trying to live the Hollywood dream, live happily ever after. But that’s, that’s real tough. And if enough planning didn’t go into discussing these things before marriage, or, you know, you get into a marriage and you know, eventually two people can grow apart. It’s okay, it’s okay that you’re not gonna stay married for 60 years. This is—it’s okay to get a divorce. We kind of can get trapped. And if you’re in a bad marriage, it can really feel like prison. And so you don’t have to stay there. We’ll be talking, you know, a lot about what divorce is gonna look like but, but I think the overall, you know, fundamental principle I bring to my firm is that it’s okay. If you’re in a toxic marriage, you’re going to be doing yourself and your family the best by getting out and moving on. So that’s Paul Seabrook. Talking about marriage and divorce.

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