Managing Your New Freedom after a Divorce

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Court has adjourned. The papers have been signed. The divorce is final. It’s time to manage your new freedom and turn the page to a new chapter, and garnering a support system and help should be at the top of your “to-do” list.

The divorce may mean relocating, navigating a new job, changing your children’s schools, looking into investing for the future, or re-accessing your current home now that you’re on your own.

Look to outside resources to help you during this critical transition to face the practicalities, your emotional state, and that of your children.

The trained attorneys at Seabrook Law Office navigate their clients’ journeys through family court and the legal process. Seabrook’s attorneys can also offer suggestions and help in managing new freedom and reclaiming the life you deserve.

Paul Seabrook, the firm’s founder with offices in San Jose and Fremont, is passionate about helping his clients even after the papers are signed and the parties go their separate ways.

“Each client must take into account their current circumstances in combination with their desire for a new and different life in navigating the divorce,” says Seabrook.  “The road to getting the life you want from where you are now will be paved by decisions you make during the divorce process.  Do not simply use an aggressive litigation tactic because it’s available,” he adds. “Make certain the steps you take in divorce account for how you want your life to be moving forward.”

Part of managing your new freedom is looking at where you are going to live and how.

Tamah Vega of Tamah Vega Designs assists clients with home organizing and design services. She helps clients transform their present home or design a new dwelling to optimize function and aesthetics for their new life.

Don’t forget to consider any other changes in your new life and what you want or need that will feed your soul and re-energize you emotionally. Do you have a new job and want to create a home office, a workout space for daily meditation or yoga, or a hobby workspace to feed your creative side? Will your children have their own rooms, or will the dinner table be the focus of loving family gatherings again?

Recreating a home environment is can be empowering for women and a process of self-discovery.

Managing your new freedom also means managing your finances for daily expenses, caring for your children, and planning for the future. Whether your ex-spouse managed the finances in your home and left you in the dark, or you paid the bills and kept the household accounts after a divorce is a time to sit down and reevaluate when you are financially. Paul Seabrook looks to the expertise of Certified Financial Planner Esther Szabo, The host of “Getting There. The Financial Good Place Podcast.”

Local realtors also offer a wealth of expertise and knowledge that can assist their clients in choosing the best neighborhoods if they are moving or getting the best value for their homes if they are selling and relocating. What schools are nearby? What services like health care and transit are nearby? Do you rent, or can you buy in today’s market? A home, like your other investments, is your new future.

Turning the page to a new chapter in your life also means taking care of yourself and your children’s emotional needs. Consider ongoing therapy to keep you and your children on track with your lifestyle, growth, and newfound independence. The transition to a new life doesn’t happen instantly when the papers are signed. It’s a process that requires nurturing and attention. Finding a support team for you and your children will empower your new family to adjust to the significant life change and ultimately help you heal as you walk away from the past and into your future.

According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, the current divorce rate is between 4o and 60 percent, with a majority of them in families with children under 18.

While divorce propels adults and children into many adjustments and challenges, and most affected will adjust to those changes, about 25 percent of children whose parents divorce experience “ongoing emotional and behavior difficulties.”

Look to professional family therapists to help formulate or define post-divorce parenting relationships. Therapy can help reassure children that they are not to blame for the divorce and that they are loved and will be cared for. Visit AAMFT.org for more information about Children and Divorce.

Compassionate and experienced, the divorce lawyers at Seabrook Law Office offer free consultations to discuss each couple and family’s unique situation and issues. Seabrook attorneys, bilingual in English and Spanish, are there to inform, educate, assist, and guide their clients from initial filing to resolution.

Contact Seabrook Law Offices. 6840 Via Del Oro, Suite 265, San Jose.(408) 769-5817 or 2201 Walnut Ave., Suite 190, Fremont.(510) 400-4984. Visit www.seabrooklawoffices.com, check out their latest blogs, or request a free consultation.

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